You are frightened, and without hesitation your brain and your body prepare you for fight or flight.

You can: Play the recording through a headset while youre doing exposure. Never think that you are going through this alone. Each time you make a note of your thoughts also mention the situation and the intensity of any feelings you had, both physical and emotional. I missed all the family get togethers that were always in the summer. Make a note if you take a long time to get to sleep, if you wake up frequently during the night, if you wake up in the early hours and cant get back to sleep. This could be a relationship or a job that makes demands or imposes structures that they just cant cope with. Typical thoughts are: I cut down my checking yesterday morning, but I was as bad as ever in the afternoon. Lots of people recover from Anxiety, but Ill be the exception. Magnifying and minimising This kind of selective attention makes bad things big and good things small, so its really a combination of filtering and discounting the positive. Rather like putting Anxiety on trial, this is a way of shining a light onto it and understanding how it works. They will. Your head tells you it is wrong, but you continue to act as if it were true because of the emotional hold it has on you. The way you eat is also important. You may have been able to use that knowledge, and the techniques we describe, to start on the road to a life free from Anxiety (no one will ever be entirely free from normal anxiety). A core belief around perfection might be I must be perfect which turns into I must be perfect or Ill be punished or its my responsibility to make myself perfect. Responsibility produces I have to stop bad things haping and if I dont stop bad things haping I deserve to be punished. Go away for a weekend. I tried visualising myself playing the tape and being calm, but for once this didnt work for me. Of course its true that many people alive today do not have the luxury of worrying about their self-esteem, or their core beliefs, because they are entirely focused on survival – enough to eat, a future for their children. Read a book or your favourite magazine. Emotional reasoning can also be a barrier to good decision making. If I didnt already have these things in place, I wouldnt be motivated to do them when Im feeling anxious. As usual its best to aim to do this gradually, in small manageable steps.

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